Good morning to you all, once again, from beautiful downtown Lake George. Since almost everyone is here, those of you who aren’t will be delighted to know that this edition will be mercifully short, if not sweet.

The celebrations yesterday to mark the thirtieth anniversary of the establishment of Sanford and Father was a huge success. All twenty-four family members were decked out with T-shirts to commemorate the occasion and past employees were also awarded a decorative T-shirt to mark the event. Penelope’s banner was erected at the entrance to the drive in case anyone was unaware of the significance of the event they were attending and Pam, with the assistance of dozens of members of the clan, had constructed a mountain of food, certainly sufficient to feed the five thousand which were expected to congregate. Beer, water and/or juice was available via the canoe bar, Sandy’s cannon was fired every hour, on the hour, and everyone had a grand time.

The weather cooperated magnificently - Lake George was at its absolute best - and the sauna at the end of the day was outstanding.

Here’s to the next thirty years!

Love to you all,

Greg

An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry an extraordinarily beautiful woman so they could produce gorgeous children beyond compare.

With that as his mission he began to search for the perfect woman.

Shortly thereafter he met a Redneck who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the Redneck and asked for permission to marry one of them.

"Well," the Redneck simply replied, "they're all lookin' to get married, so you came to the right place. Why don't you look 'em over and pick the one you want?"

The man was ecstatic, and decided to take each one out to dinner to size them all up. The first night he dated the first daughter. The next day the Redneck asked for the man's opinion.

"Well," said the man, "she's just a wee bit -- not that you can hardly notice -- pigeon-toed."

The Redneck nodded and suggested the man date one of the other girls; so the man went out with the second daughter.

The next day, the Redneck again asked how things went.

"Well," the man replied, "she's just a wee bit -- not that you can hardly tell -- cross-eyed."

The Redneck nodded and suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did.

The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming, "She's perfect, just perfect! She's the one I want to marry."

The redneck gave his blessing, so the couple was wed immediately. Months later their first baby was born. When the man visited the nursery he was horrified: the baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine. He rushed to his father-in-law and asked how such a thing could happen considering the beauty of the parents.

"Well," explained the Redneck, "she was just a wee bit -- not that you could hardly tell -- pregnant when you met her."

A visiting priest was getting the grand tour of the convent, led by one of the sisters. They go into a room with four portraits.

"Who is this?" asks the padre.

"Oh, that's the Virgin of Guadalupe"

"And this portrait?"

"That is the beautiful Virgin of Assisi"

"Who is this third one?"

"That is the Virgin of Ishia"

"And the final portrait, what virgin is she?"

"Oh, that's no virgin, that's the Mother Superior."

A blonde is taking the driving portion of her driver's license exam. She handles most of the manoeuvres quite well. She has a little trouble parallel parking, however, and winds up a couple of feet from the curb.

"Could you get a little closer?" the examiner asks.

The blonde then unbuckles her seat belt and slides over toward the examiner. "Now what?"

A man walked into a lawyer's office and inquired about the lawyer's rates.

"$50.00 for three questions", replied the lawyer.

"Isn't that awfully steep?" asked the man.

"Yes," the lawyer replied, "and what was your third question?"

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