A pipe burst in a doctor’s house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600.<\/p>\n
The doctor exclaimed, “This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor!.”<\/p>\n
The plumber quietly answered, “Neither did I when I was a doctor.”<\/p>\n
A few days before her birthday a husband asked his wife, \u201cDear, what would you like for your present?\u201d<\/p>\n
Wife: I really don\u2019t think I should say.<\/p>\n
Husband: How about a diamond ring?<\/p>\n
Wife: I don\u2019t care much for diamonds.<\/p>\n
Husband: Well, then, a mink coat?<\/p>\n
Wife: You know I do not like furs.<\/p>\n
Husband: A golden necklace?<\/p>\n
Wife: I already have three of them.<\/p>\n
Husband: Well, gosh, what do you want?<\/p>\n
Wife: What I\u2019d really like is a divorce<\/p>\n
Husband: Hmmm, I wasn\u2019t planning on spending that much.<\/p>\n
Lying on his deathbed, the wealthy Mr Sams was instructing his attorney on last-minute changes in his will.<\/p>\n
\u201cI wish to leave everything I own, all stocks, bonds property, art, and money, to my wife. However, there is one stipulation.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd that is?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIn order to inherit, she must re-marry within six months of my death.\u201d<\/p>\n
The lawyer seemed puzzled. \u201cWhy make such an unusual request?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mr Sams answered, \u201cBecause I want someone to be sorry I died.\u201d<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A pipe burst in a doctor’s house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, “This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor!.” The plumber quietly answered, “Neither did I when … <\/p>\n