A male frog goes to a psychic. The psychic tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”<\/p>\n
The frog becomes excited, “This is great! Will I meet her at a party?”<\/p>\n
“No,” says the psychic, “in her biology class.”<\/p>\n
A young man had just begun working in a caf\u00e9 and his first customer turned out to be a BIG BURLY truck driver.<\/p>\n
The young man walked up to the table where the truck driver was sitting and asked, \u201cMay I take your order, sir?\u201d<\/p>\n
The truck driver replied, \u201cSure kid. I want three flat tires and two headlights.\u201d<\/p>\n
The young man was very puzzled and said, \u201cI beg your pardon?\u201d<\/p>\n
The truck driver said again, \u201cLook kid, I want three flat tires and two headlights.\u201d<\/p>\n
The young man was still puzzled, but replied, \u201cYes sir, whatever you like.\u201d<\/p>\n
The young man then took the request to his boss, the head cook. He told him about the truck driver’s order, and that he wanted three flat tires and two headlights. \u201cI think he’s in the wrong place.\u201d<\/p>\n
The cook said, \u201cI know what he wants, he wants three flap jacks and two eggs sunny side up. He\u2019s just trying to be smart.\u201d<\/p>\n
The cook said to the waiter \u201cHere, take this bowl of beans, give it to him and say this.\u201d<\/p>\n
When the young man delivered the order the truck driver said, \u201cListen kid, I didn’t order this. I said I wanted three flat tires and two headlights.\u201d<\/p>\n
The waiter replied, \u201cWell sir, the cook said while you wait for your parts, you can gas up!\u201d<\/p>\n
Mrs Swanson declined to serve on the jury because she was not a believer in capital punishment and didn\u2019t want her beliefs to get in the way of the trial.<\/p>\n
\u201cBut, Madam,\u201d said the public defender, who had taken a liking to her kind face and calm demeanour, \u201cthis is not a murder trial. It is merely a civil lawsuit being brought by a wife against her husband. He gambled away the fifteen thousand dollars he\u2019d promised to spend on a chinchilla coat for her birthday.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHmmm,\u201d reflected Mrs Swanson. \u201cOkay, I\u2019ll serve. I could be wrong about capital punishment.\u201d<\/p>\n
A male frog goes to a psychic. The psychic tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.” The frog becomes excited, “This is great! Will I meet her at a party?” “No,” says the psychic, “in her biology class.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2877","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-amusements"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9w76b-Kp","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2877","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2877"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2877\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2877"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2877"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.stragnell.com\/befoulednews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2877"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}