18 January 2015

Good morning – hope everyone is waking to a splendidly splendid morning! (Or, for those of you ahead of our time zone, that you’ve had a wonderfully wonderful day). We’ve had a cold week but not quite cold enough – the temperature has hovered just above freezing so the ground is not frozen rock hard and the gallons of precipitation we’ve had have ensured that the ground is wonderfully soggy and muddy. As I’ve said before, if it has to be cold we would much rather have freezing temperatures so that the mud turns solid and we can simply skate over the surface on our daily walks. Regrettably, ‘tis not so and mud is the predominant feature. Continue reading “18 January 2015”

18 January 2015 – Amusements

From Dad

An elderly man was walking through the French countryside, admiring the beautiful spring day, when over a hedgerow he spotted a young couple making love in a field.

Getting over his initial shock he said to himself, “Ah, young love… ze spring time, ze air, ze flowers… C’est magnifique!”, and continued to watch, remembering the good old day’s that he’d once enjoyed.

Suddenly he gasped and said, “Mais… Sacre bleu! Ze woman she is dead!” before heading off as fast as he could to the town to tell Jean, the police chief.

He arrived at the Police Station, out of breath, and shouted, “Jean…Jean…zere is zis man, zis woman … naked in farmer Gaston’s field making love.”

The police chief smiled and said, “Come, come, Henri you are not so old, remember ze young love, ze spring time, ze air, ze flowers? Ah, L’amour! Zis is OK.”

“Mais non! You do not understand, ze woman, she is dead!” Upon hearing this, Jean, leapt up from his seat, rushed out of the station, jumped on his push­bike, pedalled down to the field, confirmed Henri’s story, and pedalled all the way back to call the doctor.

He picked up the telephone and screamed, “Pierre, Pierre! This is Jean, I was in Gaston’s field, zere is a young couple naked having sex!”

To which Pierre replied, “Jean, I am a man of science. You must remember…it’s spring, ze air, ze flowers, Ah, L’amour! Zis is very natural.”

Jean, still out of breath, grasped in reply, “NON, you do not understand, ze woman, she is dead!”

Hearing this, Pierre exclaimed, “Mon dieu!” grabbed his black medicine bag, stuffed in his thermometer, stethoscope, and other tools, jumped in his car, and drove like a madman down to Gaston’s field.

After carefully examining the participants he drove calmly back to Henri and Jean, who were waiting at the station.

When he got there, went inside, smiled patiently, and said, “Ah, mes amis, do not worry. Ze woman, she is not dead, she is British!” Continue reading “18 January 2015 – Amusements”