Well, we had a 100% improvement in the weather this week: last week we had one nice day; this week it was two (Tuesday and Wednesday). If this trend continues we might actually get to enjoy a decent run of tolerable weather. On the other hand, Wimbledon starts this week and that’s generally a precursor to a couple of weeks of even lousier weather. So, who knows? Continue reading “24 June 2012”
24 June 2012 – Amusements
I walked into Dairy Queen the other day and asked for a hot fudge sundae with extra hot fudge. The girl replied, “The hot fudge only comes in one temperature, sir.” Continue reading “24 June 2012 – Amusements”
17 June 2012
Good morning to you all on what I hope is a pleasantly pleasant day wherever you might find yourself. We had a very pleasant day this week: on Wednesday the sun shone, it was warm and the skies were clear. I only mention this because it was in such marked contrast to our weather the rest of the week – unremitting rain, wind and gloom. We received the following from Erik Benson which just about sums it all up. Continue reading “17 June 2012”
17 June 2012 – Amusements
Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, “That’s because it’s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it.”
The next day, the pastor was over at Emily’s family’s house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, “That’s because it’s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it.” Continue reading “17 June 2012 – Amusements”
10 June 2012
Good morning to you all and I hope you are all in as fine a fettle as it is possible to be. Of course, much of this week has been all about the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee which has succeeded beyond anyone’s expectations in distracting both the press and the general population from the economic turmoil in which we find ourselves. Although the weather has been lousy, there has been much pomp and circumstance, great waving of flags and rousing three cheers. I should have bought bunting futures – bunting manufacturers must have made enough to retire on the sales leading up to this past weekend. Even I have to concede – one thing the Brits do well is put on pageants such as this. Fortunately, for those of us who are not particularly Royalist in our leanings, the various media sites have put together a collection of video clips which mean that we didn’t have to sit through the whole four days of nonsense; there are some excellent time lapse sequences which allow you to experience the events in a matter of moments. Continue reading “10 June 2012”
10 June 2012 – Amusements
Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait. Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm. The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm. Feeling sorry for the little snake with no lunch, he snatched him up again and poured a little beer down his throat. Then he went about his fishing.
An hour or so later the fisherman felt a tug at his pant leg. Looking down, he saw the same snake with three more worms in his mouth… Continue reading “10 June 2012 – Amusements”
3 June 2012 – Penelope’s Sixty Sensational Celebratory Surprises
As I hinted last week, we’ve been busier than a one-armed wall paper hanger preparing ourselves for Penelope’s Sixty Sensational Celebratory Surprises which culminated in a grand surprise birthday party last Saturday. This had been literally days in the preparation yet in spite of the general perception that Greg was probably incapable of organising the proverbial piss-up in a brewery, the day and evening actually went off reasonably well. Most importantly, Ms Playchute appears to have been genuinely surprised by the collection of friends, family and acquaintances who gathered in our back garden to greet her.
Continue reading “3 June 2012 – Penelope’s Sixty Sensational Celebratory Surprises”
3 June 2012 – Amusements
Three buddies die in a car crash, and they find themselves at the pearly gates.
They are all asked, “When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you?”
The first guy says, “I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor and a great family man.”
The second guy says, “I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow.”
The last guy replies, “I would like to hear them say… LOOK!!! HE’S MOVING!!!!!” Continue reading “3 June 2012 – Amusements”